Post by Meomi on Jul 11, 2012 17:02:57 GMT -7
A WICKED PROPOSITION
..::Chapter 16::..
Her cries soon turned outright weaping as she lay against him, hot tears sliding down her cheeks in warm rivulets.
Nicholas: Catherine, did I hurt you, love?
Catherine: Get away from me! Just leave me alone!
Nicholas was grim as he saw the raw self-loathing ravaging her face now. She hated herself for this, the look said. Nicholas sat back reluctantly and let her be. Nicholas wanted to console her, but knew the last thing she wanted was his comfort right now.
Nicholas: Why do you cry, Catherine?
Catherine: You have made me what I only pretended to be before. I only agreed to do this to one man! It is you who has brought me so low now!
Nicholas: So you admit your arrangement with Gabriel was all an act at last. It appears you got caught up in the masquerade, love.
Catherine: It might have started out that way. It is different now. You would not understand how I feel.
Nicholas: You imagined a great deal happening with Gabriel, didn't you Catherine? He found you in a brothel, love. Do you think he will ever forget that? He will tire of you and move on to the next. If you thought it to be more, you will be hurt. Your pretty lies have covered up all the ugliness, but it is still there, isn't it? You tell yourself you care for him to make it acceptable in your mind that he paid for all you give him.
Catherine: Stop it! Just stop!
Nicholas: No, I think you need to hear it, love. You deceived the man from the start, Catherine! You have done all you can to keep him married to a woman he despises. Do you think he would thank you for it? And what does that make you? Where do you think to take this arrangements now? He is married. Even if he were free, he would not offer you more. Leave him. Come to me. He will not stand in your way.
She flung him a dark look and moved away from him.
Nicholas: You do not have to pretend to be something you are not with me. You know it is what you want.
Catherine: You do not know everything about me, Nicholas! I have to go home.
Nicholas: He hired a very competent detective to investigate his wife, Catherine. Do you think he will not find out all you have been doing? You have never seen Gabriel when he is angry, love. He is not especially forgiving either.
Catherine: You ask me to leave him and go to you? That will make him happy, you think?
Nicholas: He will not stand in our way, Catherine. He might be angry, but he would get over it.
Catherine: You don't feel badly at all, do you? You are his friend! If I leave him at all, I am going home. I am not trading one arrangement for another. I will take what you have promised me and go.
Nicholas: You feel guilt finally? Think of how I feel. When you are gone, I will still be here. I will remember you then, Catherine, not him. He will find another to console him. I will always recall how I betrayed him just to have you, and it was not worth it at all.
Catherine cringed at his biting words.
Catherine watched him in bruised silence count out the three thousand pounds and gave her the documents. He slammed the door when he left, making her flinch. Catherine believed she loved Gabriel, and was confused to have these feelings for Nicholas too. She would think of him no more.
Catherine spoke with the driver. He consented to take her down to the docks before taking her home. She found the shipping office and secured passage back to Dublin. The ship would leave in a month's time. She paid for her ticket, counting out the money to the clerk.
Three weeks had passed since her afternoon with Nicholas, and she could no longer deny this newest truth. She was with child. Her monthly time, which was always on the mark, had passed. She soaked in the tub brooding. The insidious truth wormed its way to the surface. She could not know which man fathered the child, and was in denial of her situation. Gabriel was even more attentive to her now, which made her writhe in guilt. They went out nightly to musicals, the opera, and any play that caught her fancy. One part of her wanted the uncouth sea captain, try as she might to deny it. She was furious to have gotten immersed in such an impossible tangle. She could have neither one of them.
Mrs Whitley helped her towel dry. She missed the woman's knowing look at the increasing fullness of her breasts. The woman said nothing and helped her.
Mrs Whitley had no choice but to walk twelve blocks to seek out Lilly. The Countess greeted her with an icy glare.
Lilly: You took your time in coming to me. What have you learned.
Mrs Whitley: She is with child, my lady. I'm sure of it.
The Countess smiled tightly and sat back in her chair.
Lilly: You are very sure?
Mrs Whitley: There is no mistake, my lady.
Lilly smiled smugly. She decided it was time she had a long overdue chat with her husband.
To be continued...
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